


No Regrets

by Just Jen (Niko)



Category: Earth 2 (TV 1994)
Genre: Gen, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-06-14
Updated: 2010-06-14
Packaged: 2017-10-10 03:00:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/94735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Niko/pseuds/Just%20Jen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As the Eden Project launch-date approaches, John has second thoughts and True's feeling abandoned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Regrets

**Author's Note:**

> (Originally posted as "True's Mother", more as a mandatory label than a real title.)

True Danziger was in the middle of a firefight, and loving every minute of it. Her Phoenix-level fighter zigzagged between alien cruisers as if they were standing still, and she dodged enemy fire with ease. A war whoop escaped her as she zeroed in on her target. She blasted one final enemy craft to smithereens, and then she could see it. The aliens' mothership hovered across only a dozen or so kilometers of clear space, pitifully defenseless now that True had broken through the outer defense. Time for one last bombing run and then... a hand closed around True's upper arm, although she was alone in the Phoenix cockpit, and a voice said "The gear's coming off, True."

True had only a brief moment to prepare herself for the abrupt end of the program before the VR gear was pulled unceremoniously from her head. She scowled frustratedly up at Alex Wentworth's stern face, trying to keep her eyes from tearing up too much in the bright light of the "real world." Watery eyes would COMPLETELY ruin the effect of shocked indignation True was trying to get across.

"It's not very safe to pull me out of VR like that, Wentworth." The little girl scolded. "You could have killed me." _And besides, I was just ready to blast the mothership_, she added to herself.

"And besides, you were just about to beat your old record, or something like that, right?" Alex shot back, glancing down at the gear to identify the game she'd been playing. "Space Invaders from Galaga, huh? Sounds riveting."

True bristled at the sarcasm in Wentworth's voice.

"ACTUALLY, I was about to blast the mothership and win the WHOLE GAME!" she burst out. "I NEVER got that far before! And now I didn't even have a chance to save my place. I'm going to have to start ALL OVER!"

"Well, that just gives you something more to look forward to for next time, then." Alex wasn't sorry at ALL. True was ready to SCREAM.

"Well, I guess I'll have plenty of time tonight, since you guys are just ABANDONING me." She muttered sulkily. She couldn't believe it. Tomorrow, her dad, Wentworth, and the other Eden crew members were going to be boarding the Eden Advance ship for final systems checks and True wouldn't see any of them for four whole days, at least. None of the passengers (and that counted True) were allowed on until people like her dad and Alex gave the all-clear signal that said that the ships were ready for takeoff.

For FOUR WHOLE DAYS, True was going to be left with Kathy, this friend of Alex's who had this TOTAL "Baby True" complex and seemed to think True was about five years old. And to make matters worse, True hadn't seen her dad practically all day today, either. He had left her with Alex early this afternoon, without telling her where he was going, and NOW Alex was leaving too to go to some party with True's dad and Les and the other Eden crews. True just felt too, TOO abandoned.

Alex sighed, crouching down to be on eye level with True, who was seated cross-legged on her bunk, set into the wall of the room. "Now, True-girl, don't get all sulky." She reprimanded. "You're dad &amp; I need time to be with our friends. We aren't gonna be seeing them again for a long time... some of 'em, maybe never. You, on the other hand, have got us for-EVER."

True fell back on the bed. "Yeah, I know, I know. Why do I have to get stuck with Kathy, though? She is SOOO boring. She keeps trying to buy me dresses and dolls and stuff." Alex burst out laughing.

"She wants to _buy_ you stuff? That's what's so horrible about her? Take her up on it, girl! You could use a few nice dresses and dolls. You're pop and me and Les haven't been exactly the best at getting you to act like a girl."

True scowled. "There's nothing wrong with the way I act NOW!" she harrumphed. "I don't need her trying to treat me like a baby who can't choose my own stuff."

"Alright, I'll have a talk with her... no dolls and no dresses for the next four days. Beyond that, I can't do much. Kath's the only one around here with the time to keep an eye on you."

"I don't need anyone to keep an eye on me. It's not like I have anything to do except VR."

Alex glanced down at the gear in her hand, suddenly realizing how much time True had spent in VR the last few months since they'd relocated to the temporary quarters by the Eden docks to be able to handle last minute emergencies. The girl hadn't made much effort to make new friends here.

"Well, why don't you make a change to that and spend some time with _real_ kids for a couple days before we ship off." She suggested. True shrugged noncommittally.

"Nobody around here but Syndrome Babies..." she muttered. Alex let the comment slide. She was running late already, and the conversation was already too far into one of True's famous "Yeah, but..." spirals.

"OK, up to you... but VR's no substitute for real life, kiddo, no matter how exciting it is at the time." Alex crossed the room and dropped the gear in her hand into Danziger's lock box, closing it securely with John's latest security code. She ignored True's outraged protests. "Think about that, tonight. Or think about something else, I don't care... just THINK. It's too easy to forget how to think if you don't practice enough, and tonight'll do just fine for a little practice."

True sank back on the bed, a defeated little downturn to her mouth. Alex patted her head, planted a kiss goodnight on her forehead, and left. As the door closed, True heard her locking the door and sighed. There would be no getting out tonight without setting off warning alarms from here to Earth and back. Well, she'd just have to settle for defeating that darned mother ship. With a satisfied smile, True padded across the room and keyed in her dad's latest lockbox combination (it had been easy to crack this time) and settled down to save the universe.

***

The Eden Crew's Bon Voyage party, being held in a storage hangar emptied in the initial building phase of the Eden project, was already well underway when Wentworth made her appearance, pausing in the doorway to give her eyes a chance to adjust to the dimmed lighting of the improvised ballroom. As she stepped inside, she felt her "love radar" kick in to locate Les waving to her from a spot toward the center of the room. He had staked out a spot near the bar, as always, and shared the table with Noah Kenner, a friend from the Ops Crew onboard the Colony Ship, and Ilene Etrich, one of the many technicians for whom the launching of the Eden Project would simply mean the ending of three years work and moving on to another job in another hangar.

Alex dodged around several larger groups, her ears picking up the usual chatter... the chief topics tonight would be last minute instructions about the Eden ships (all of which would be forgotten in tomorrow's hangovers,) the potential success of Devon Adair's mad scheme to trek across the galaxy to save her son, and, of course, the ever-present question as to how much interest all those credits would accrue sitting in the bank for fifty years.

"Glad you could join us," Les grinned as Alex settled herself next to him. "Our dear Miss True settled for the night?"

"As settled as that child ever gets. I ended up locking her in for the night." Alex returned. Les nodded understandingly and Noah and Ilene chuckled. True was well known to most Project personnel by now, with her tendency to wander all over the project compound at unexpected hours.

"She'll be hopping mad at that. I wouldn't have put it past her to make an appearance here this evening."

"Yeah, she was mad. More that Danz wasn't around today, though, I think." Alex's mood sobered, and she glanced around the room again. "He make it back yet? It would've been nice if he'd stopped to say goodnight to her."

Les directed her gaze to a back corner of the room, and Wentworth sighed. It had been too much to hope that he wouldn't let things get to him, she supposed. Danziger had commandeered a table for himself as far from the center of the merriment as possible and was slumped in his chair, staring moodily at a bottle in his hand.

"He came in a little before you did," Ilene murmured sympathetically. "He doesn't look like he's in any kind of shape for his kid to see him."

Alex harrumphed "She's seen him worse. But you're right. It's good he didn't go home before here." She caught Noah and Ilene's puzzled gazes turned back to her. Les, of course, already knew. "He went to... say goodbye to Elle... arrange for her care while he's gone."

The other two suddenly found themselves an incredible interest in the water stains on the tabletop, not wanting to intrude on the personal tragedies that lay exposed on the faces of Alex, Les, and, on the other side of the room, John Danziger. Like True, herself, the story of the girl's mother was known by most of the Eden crews. Well, actually, it wasn't really known. Few knew the exact details, but all of them knew enough to know not to bring up the subject around Danziger or even mention it while on the same station with True. And Danziger commanded enough respect among them that they did not gossip away from the two Danzigers either.

Alex sighed, setting down the drink that she had only just picked up.

"I'll have to excuse myself for a bit, folks. Save my seat."

"Always." Les assured her. That one word provided enough support to get her across the room and plop down at John's table. The big man glanced up sharply at her arrival, a "get the hell away from me" look on his face, which faded to just plain "go away" when he realized who was sitting there. Alex offered a questioning little smile.

"Tough day?"

John grunted, taking a gulp of whatever was in the bottle. "I don't want to talk about it, Wentworth."

"OK, fine. How about we just sit, then."

They did just that, in silence, for several minutes, Alex regretting leaving her own glass at the other table.

"True get to bed all right?" Danziger finally broke the silence. Fine, change the subject, Alex thought, just stop agonizing over it.

"Yeah. I had to take the VR off of her, though." Alex was about to mention that the girl had been left alone with VR way too often lately, but now was not the right time to question John's parenting skills. "Oh, I put it in the lockbox, by the way. She'll probably nag you for it when you get back. I used the latest lock code."

John chuckled dryly, humorlessly. "She's already got it, then. She figured that code out last week. I've been meaning to change it and hadn't had the chance. Sorry 'bout that."

Alex laughed a bit more genuinely, thinking of that pouty little face True had given her when the gear got put away. Had it been a real pout or a face to mask a grin? The girl was a master. John suddenly looked up at her from the mesmerizing bottle and Alex caught back her laugh at the grief she saw there. It hadn't popped up like that for a long while now.

"Did I do the right thing, Alex?" He whispered in a rumbling, raspy voice. Alex reached out to take his hand, but he pulled back.

"I don't know which right thing you're meaning, honey." She murmured. There were so many choices. Which was bothering him most tonight?

"ALL of it!" he burst out, pushing the dusty blond curls out of his eyes maniacally. "Keeping her on support after True was born, not telling True about her mom, passing on the STIM, putting her in cold sleep now, when we're all going to be gone for 50 years! It's like, I'm keeping her in limbo... the convenient popsicle to thaw out when I've got time to visit! Maybe I should just end it now, y'know? Take her off support, let the rest of her die like her soul did years ago. That way, True wouldn't have to know any different, and when we get back, we'd have even more money because I wouldn't have to use it to pay for cold sleep maintenance for 50 years, and…and it would all be over once and for all."

Alex was stunned. She had not known that John was even considering turning off Elle's support. She thought he'd made his decisions on that a long time ago. Moving quickly, she grabbed the hand he had pulled away from her a few moments before and forced him to focus on her, pulling him away from his own guilt.

"Danziger, where is this coming from, huh?" She asked firmly. She did not give him a chance to answer. She had to address his concerns first. "Why did you leave Elle on neuro support after True was born?"

John cringed at the name, but Alex waited for him to recover, pointedly expecting an answer. "I wanted True to be able to meet her when she was older." He finally answered, softly.

"NOT a bad decision." Alex clipped. "If you wanted True to meet her, why didn't you go with a STIM?"

"You know why!" he rasped. Admittedly, this was an easy one. No one really thought STIMS were much of a choice. She let the answer go at that. Now a tough one... one in which Alex herself didn't quite agree with John's reasoning.

"Again, NOT a bad decision. Why didn't you tell True about Elle's accident?"

His eyes teared over. Good. It was clean grief now, not the guilt-tainted stuff from earlier.

"It hurt too much." He whispered. "Damn it, Wentworth, stop this! I get the point!"

"All right, but one more. Why did you have Elle put in cold sleep today instead of just pulling the plug? Was it to have a "convenient popsicle" or because you didn't know what else to do with all that money? Or was it for the same reason you kept her here in the first place? To give your daughter a chance to know her mother? You know what the answer is, Johnny. And if it was right back then, it's still right now."

Her other hand moved out to join the first in clasping Danziger's large hand in a warm grip. "We're going to go off into space in a few weeks, and when we come back, Ellie will still be here for you and for True. Until then, she'll be dreaming in cold sleep, just like us. Nothing wrong with that, John Danziger. Understood?"

She felt the tension and grief go out of him for the moment, and he nodded. "Good. Now, let's go drink a lot of booze and say goodbye to some people who might NOT be around when we get back."

~End~

_Thanks for reading!_


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